Bernie Sanders

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Dear-sweet-mother-of-pearl, this campaign season just will not end! It feels like we’ve been hearing about 2016 since 2013—probably because we have—but finally we have the major party conventions behind us. Also the ...
Hope Out The Ying-Yang

Everything You Wanted To Know about the DNC 2016 in Philly (But Couldn’t Bear to Watch)

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Dear-sweet-mother-of-pearl, this campaign season just will not end! It feels like we’ve been hearing about 2016 since 2013—probably because we have—but finally we have the major party conventions behind us. Also the Libertarian National Convention which blew the RNC and DNC out of the water when it came to brevity and weirdness. But
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This election, man. What a show! With all of the yelling, puffing, showboating, and spectacle, it’s easy to forget just how important this process is – and how broken it is. Everrrrrrrrryone is tired of the two-party ...
Two Roads Diverged, and We Got Lost

The Illusion of Choice

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This election, man. What a show! With all of the yelling, puffing, showboating, and spectacle, it’s easy to forget just how important this process is – and how broken it is. Everrrrrrrrryone is tired of the two-party system. For the first time in, well, quite some time, both sides of the aisle are fronting two [&hellip
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“He’s a lying liar!” “She started it!” “They’re not being fair!” “It looks like he peed his pants!” “He’s a loser!” No, you’re not overhearing a fight at recess because schools have ...
Stop It Right Now Or I'm Turning This Election Around!

Where Did All The Grown-ups Go?

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“He’s a lying liar!” “She started it!” “They’re not being fair!” “It looks like he peed his pants!” “He’s a loser!” No, you’re not overhearing a fight at recess because schools have all canceled recess so America’s children will get better at life’s most important skills like filling in those little bubbles
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Just when you thought things couldn’t get any more interesting, this week’s episode of the hit soap 2016: Election of Doom brought the big stuff. There was violence, amnesia, sweating, and even more violence. The ...
In a world…

Donald Trump and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Week

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Just when you thought things couldn’t get any more interesting, this week’s episode of the hit soap 2016: Election of Doom brought the big stuff. There was violence, amnesia, sweating, and even more violence. The intrigue! The violence! Was this the best episode yet? So let’s recap: Evil Scrooge-character-with-less-money Donald Trum
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The most frightening part of achieving adulthood is the realization that adults are just children who can drive. For two decades I believed adults had control of their lives; that they knew better; that they were rational. ...
Screw You Guys; I'm Going Home

Citizens Against Democracy

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The most frightening part of achieving adulthood is the realization that adults are just children who can drive. For two decades I believed adults had control of their lives; that they knew better; that they were rational. When I moved out, however, got a full time job, and started paying attention to the news, I [&hellip
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Dear Secretary Clinton, Congratulations on your recent caucus and primary wins. It feels like momentum has shifted away from Bernie Sanders and in your favor, despite some poll tightening and the nagging controversy over ...
Just Make It Easy For Me To Help

Secretary Clinton, Let’s Talk About Volunteer Onboarding

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Dear Secretary Clinton, Congratulations on your recent caucus and primary wins. It feels like momentum has shifted away from Bernie Sanders and in your favor, despite some poll tightening and the nagging controversy over the private email system that you used while serving in the State Department. I think you’re well on your way to bea
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Have you heard the Democratic Party has recently been overrun by Superdelegates, hell-bent on making sure ‘Murica doesn’t feel the Bern? Before you Tweet your outrage or appear on Fox News to show how steamed you are at ...
Plus Everyone Hates Them!

Superdelegates! Like Superheroes But Way Less Exciting

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Have you heard the Democratic Party has recently been overrun by Superdelegates, hell-bent on making sure ‘Murica doesn’t feel the Bern? Before you Tweet your outrage or appear on Fox News to show how steamed you are at Debbie Wasserman Schultz, take a moment and hit the pause button. Despite what you may assume given [&hellip
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Did you know political correctness is literally killing people? That’s because it’s not. An easy way to get applause is to say how much you hate political correctness (other easy ways include hating politicians and the ...
Manners Maketh The Man...Er, Person

The Civil War

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Did you know political correctness is literally killing people? That’s because it’s not. An easy way to get applause is to say how much you hate political correctness (other easy ways include hating politicians and the media; it’s like hating Mondays and people who kick kittens). ‘Murica sure loves to hate stuff, especially when
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Saturday night US TV viewers were given two different platforms to watch candidates show off their best stuff. The GOP debate went about as to be expected (although Christie’s takedown of Marco “Mr. Roboto” Rubio was ...
Forget Debates, Let’s Do The SNL Test

Cancel the Presidential Debates

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Saturday night US TV viewers were given two different platforms to watch candidates show off their best stuff. The GOP debate went about as to be expected (although Christie’s takedown of Marco “Mr. Roboto” Rubio was pretty spectacular), but I’m more interested in the other appearance of the night, Bernie Sanders on Saturday Night
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