24 hour “noose” cycle

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Upon hearing that Brock Turner—a brutal rapist who was only sentenced to six months because a judge worried it would hurt the poor boy’s future—will be released early from prison because of good behavior, I became so ...
And Probably More Wine, Too

When I Am Queen of Everything: We Need More Whimsy, Dammit!

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Upon hearing that Brock Turner—a brutal rapist who was only sentenced to six months because a judge worried it would hurt the poor boy’s future—will be released early from prison because of good behavior, I became so enraged I wanted to rip off my own arm so I could have something with which to better [&hellip
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When there's a problem, particularly a big one, we love blaming other people. There are few things more satisfying then identifying someone to blame and then blaming the bejeezus out of that person. It’s not the most ...
And Not Just For Actually Watching These Debates

What Can We Do When We Are The Dumbasses?

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When there’s a problem, particularly a big one, we love blaming other people. There are few things more satisfying then identifying someone to blame and then blaming the bejeezus out of that person. It’s not the most useful of actions; it doesn’t really fix whatever is wrong but crap on a spatula, does it feel [&hellip
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As the field of Democratic Presidential candidates steadily dwindles, the GOP field is the game of “99 bottles of beer” on the wall that won’t end -- if by “bottles of beer” we meant ass-achingly annoying ...
Could This One At Least Feature and Obstacle Course?

Two Steps Forward, Two Steps Back: Latest Debate Drinking Game

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As the field of Democratic Presidential candidates steadily dwindles, the GOP field is the game of “99 bottles of beer” on the wall that won’t end — if by “bottles of beer” we meant ass-achingly annoying candidates and by game we meant endless electoral cycle. And so we try to whip up some alcohol-based enthusiasm [&hellip
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Just a few days left to this year’s Women’s History Month but before we go back to men ruling history and the world, let’s take a few brief moments to dispel some of the truly hilarious/maddening myths about women’s ...
Yes, it is still Women's History Month

Women’s History Month Part 3: Myths

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Just a few days left to this year’s Women’s History Month but before we go back to men ruling history and the world, let’s take a few brief moments to dispel some of the truly hilarious/maddening myths about women’s history, feminism and female humans in general. We were going to interview actual misguided asshats but [&hellip
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As 2014 mercifully draws to a close, let’s look back briefly at the times when ‘Murica attempted to be interested in things that were happening in the rest of the world and the 24-hour noose cycle came forth with some ...
But Only For Short Spans of Time

This Year in Media Jackassery: America Pretends to Be Interested in the Rest of World

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As 2014 mercifully draws to a close, let’s look back briefly at the times when ‘Murica attempted to be interested in things that were happening in the rest of the world and the 24-hour noose cycle came forth with some truly inspired reporting. 1. If you got all your news from CNN in 2014, you’d [&hellip
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We originally wanted to recap what happened in Congress in 2014 but since single-celled amoeba are more productive than American politicians we figured the juice wasn’t worth the squeeze. When we really thought about it ...
This is Why We Can't Have Nice Things

This Year in Media Jackassery: ‘Murica

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We originally wanted to recap what happened in Congress in 2014 but since single-celled amoeba are more productive than American politicians we figured the juice wasn’t worth the squeeze. When we really thought about it though, there was something that irritated us even more than Congress (or at least as much): the 24-hour noose cycle.
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The Snap: With pundits and politicians backing away from Cliven Bundy faster than hipsters back away from their own farts at a crowded party, it’s been a tough call as to who “won” This Month in Jackassery. Would it ...
Whenever I hear anyone arguing over slavery, I feel a strong impulse to see it tried on him personally.

This Month in Jackassery: What The Hell Kind Of Name is Cliven Anyway?

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The Snap: With pundits and politicians backing away from Cliven Bundy faster than hipsters back away from their own farts at a crowded party, it’s been a tough call as to who “won” This Month in Jackassery. Would it be the man himself – a patriot who doesn’t recognize the authority of the United States [&hellip
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The Snap: Ask omniscient Google how many newscasters are women and you’ll be answered with links to “hottest cable news anchors,” “most sexy newscasters of all time,” and important issues like the hair, makeup ...
Haven't Bought My IWD Gift Yet? Minions Are Always Nice

The Media and International Women’s Day

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The Snap: Ask omniscient Google how many newscasters are women and you’ll be answered with links to “hottest cable news anchors,” “most sexy newscasters of all time,” and important issues like the hair, makeup and fashion choices of female reporters. What happened during NBC’s coverage of the Olympics (other than awkward lugin
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The Snap: Can we all finally agree that Hitler comparisons have jumped the shark? Actually, let’s first all agree that the phrase “jumping the shark” has in fact jumped the shark. Then let’s all recognize that ...
I May Have Nightmares of Fonzi Jumping Over a DVD of Jaws While Wearing a Hitler Mask

Hitler’s Big Day

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The Snap: Can we all finally agree that Hitler comparisons have jumped the shark? Actually, let’s first all agree that the phrase “jumping the shark” has in fact jumped the shark. Then let’s all recognize that modern day wackjobs have taken all of the meaning out of calling someone Hitler. Forget that it’s completely unimaginati
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