Corey WilsonFriday,16 October 2015

One of the first things I was taught as a young writer was to be confident and direct. Don’t pussyfoot around my point; don’t say “seems to,” or “maybe.” Be assertive and confident. “Mr. Keith Ablow is a douche bag; fuck that guy!”

Like that. See?

It’s for that reason that I was so drawn to Mr. Ablow’s article about Ben Carson and the Holocaust. In it, he’s very confident, as seen in his topic sentence:

“Ben Carson is right, and Jonathan Greenblatt is wrong.”

That oozes confidence; it’s a great topic sentence.

Unfortunately, the second thing I was taught as a young writer was to be right. And right Mr. Ablow isn’t.

A few weeks ago (I guess, because it’s not hyperdinked, because why would Fox News ever hyperlink something? It’s not like I’m busy. I can do it. I use Google Chrome; I don’t even have to bring up Google. I can just use the address bar. So I don’t know why I’m still complaining; it’s not like it’s their fucking jobs to cite things, but it’s cool. I’ll just do it myself), Ben Carson asserted that “if guns had not been confiscated from Jews, then Hitler would have had more trouble orchestrating the Holocaust.”

Which I guess makes logical sense. It’s harder to kill a guy who also has a gun than it is to kill say, me, who’s never held a gun. Unfortunately for the Jews in and around Nazi Germany, they were also up against the entire Third Reich. So hey, they were fucked to begin with, but they could’ve made a non-existent dent into those millions of soldiers if it weren’t for Hitler and his damn gun control! Thanks, Oba— wait.

So, Carson’s statements are true. It would’ve been technically harder to orchestrate the Holocaust if he’d have let the Jewish people keep their weapons, because the untrained, Jewish civilians could’ve defended themselves against the highly trained, professional soldiers they’d be fighting against. But either way, they still would’ve lost horribly. So, Carson’s assertion is stupid.

We can chalk it up to Ben Carson being Ben Carson: dumb. And we can move on with our day. Unfortunately we can’t chalk Mr. Ablow up to being Mr. Ablow: dumb. And call it a day, because he doesn’t merely support Carson, he takes it to a whole ‘nother level.

“The mindset that Jews surrendered with their guns is far more important than the hardware they turned over: They surrendered the demonstrated intention, at all costs, to resist being deprived of liberty.”

So now we’ve gone from: don’t let Obama take away your guns because Hitler. To: the Jews are in part responsible for their incarceration because they surrendered to a clearly unbeatable foe.

Don’t believe me? Let’s read the rest of the paragraph.

“If Jews in Germany had more actively resisted the Nazi party or the Nazi regime and had diagnosed it as a malignant and deadly cancer from the start, there would, indeed, have been a chance for the people of that country and the world to be moved to action by their bold refusal to be enslaved.”

So it’s not just Hitler’s fault millions of Jews were killed. The Jews gave up their (ridiculously slim chance at) liberty because… because…

“Yes, that would have required immeasurable courage. Yes, that would have required unspeakable losses. But is that not the lesson of the Old Testament? Does not Abraham bind his son Issac to an altar, willing to sacrifice his son’s life to God’s Word—to the truth? Must not we all be ready to sacrifice ourselves to stand in the way of evil?”

Ohh! Because they were cowards.

But who am I to question your authority, Ablow? As you said: “[I] have studied the Holocaust.”

Weird because you’d figure your studies would’ve mentioned the uprising in the Warsaw Ghetto.

Or all of these other resistances and uprisings.

Weird. It’s almost as though you’re a stupid liar who hasn’t studied the Holocaust, who foolhardily blamed millions upon millions of people for their own murder. Are you allowed to call Jewish people cowards because you were born Jewish? Is… that how it works? Am I not allowed to call you stupid because I’m not bald? I’m confused; I’m sorry. I just don’t understand how you think it’s okay to make Holocaust victims partly responsible.

Anyway, the last thing I was taught as a young writer was to bring my article full circle. And so I conclude.

Mr. Ablow is a douche bag; fuck that guy.

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Image Credit: Gage Skidmore on Flickr

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