Women’s History Month Part 3: Myths
Women’s History Month Part 3: Myths
Adrienne BoettingerMonday,23 March 2015
Just a few days left to this year’s Women’s History Month but before we go back to men ruling history and the world, let’s take a few brief moments to dispel some of the truly hilarious/maddening myths about women’s history, feminism and female humans in general. We were going to interview actual misguided asshats but as we’d like to get through this post without having a rage stroke, we thought it might be better to explore these myths in a fictional town hall.
Q: Why do women need a Women’s History Month? The reason men star in the history books is because men have played a more significant role in history. A month isn’t going to change that.
A: That’s an excellent question and we’re quite impressed by the number of multisyllabic words you learned to make yourself sound like less of a troglodyte. Men didn’t play a more significant role in history. Men are the ones writing most of the history books and making most of the laws about what schools can and can’t teach. But you’re right; a month isn’t going to change the fact that men take center stage in the history books. We’d like a decade or two to make up for the millennia that we’ve had to listen to you wax rhapsodic on your wonderfulness but a month is all we’re getting.
Q: Why do all you feminazis hate men? It’s because you can’t get a man, right?
A: How precious that you’re so concerned for Rush Limbaugh’s diminishing power that you bring back one of his favorite words: feminazi. And it’s not at all demeaning to feminists or women who speak out to refer to them as Nazis just as it doesn’t make light of the millions of people who were killed by actual Nazis. We’d try to ignore the idiotic parts of your question to attempt to answer the heart of the inquiry but the whole thing is idiotic so we’re not sure where to start. No, feminists don’t hate men. In fact, men can be feminists. And as you’ve proven men can also be asshats. And if you’re an example of the man you want us to get, then we’d rather get our head sewn to the carpet than get you.
Q: Women don’t need a whole month to talk about themselves; they do most of the talking all year long.
A: That’s not really a question, but we’ll bite. Women don’t do most of the talking. In 63 American studies on the topic, women only spoke more in 2 of them. In 100 public seminars, women only asked more questions than men in 7. Research in the U.S., U.K. and New Zealand shows that men dominate the talking time in committee meetings, staff meetings, seminars and task-oriented decision-making groups. Women hold only 3% of positions of clout in mainstream media and only 20% of news articles are about women.
Q: Women are always complaining about how there are not enough of them in Congress and how they’ve never been in the White House but if women cared so much about this why don’t they run for office?
A: It is hard to imagine why women don’t run for office more often given the flattering way the media and political leaders describe female politicians: shrew, harpy, whiner, complainer, ditz, ugly, fat, bitch, PMS-ing and bossy. Meanwhile, men are described as displaying leadership, competitive, forthright, hardworking and ambitious. The U.S. ranks 97th in the entire world in terms of women in national government. To run for election in this country means you need to be able to raise a shit-ton of money to inundate people’s consciousness with your campaign ads. Most of that money goes to men, which means men are more likely to be able to start and maintain a campaign.
Agree with us? Disagree with us? Let us know on Twitter. And have a very happy women’s History Month!