What Would Wonder Woman Do?

What Would Wonder Woman Do?

Adrienne BoettingerMonday,20 January 2014

The Snap:

In times of trouble during your life, there’s probably someone you’ve turned to for inspiration (Jesus, Brian Boitano, Martha Stewart, whoever) and wondered what that individual would do in your shoes. When preparing for a difficult presentation at work or a confrontation with a rude neighbor, it’s become trite to turn to your customized bracelet and think WWJD. For those of us from a certain generation, that question is often: What Would Wonder Woman Do? I say certain generation as with the exception of re-runs, modern day Wonder Woman wannabes have lived in a world without Diana Prince’s alter ego. Why are there so many superheroes that we’re almost tripping over them at the box office and yet this most powerful of superheroines remains a post-production dream deferred?

The Download:

Why does every Wonder Woman project seem doomed? There have been scads of attempts to bring WW to life on the small and big screen; from Joss Whedon to the CW to NBC, from Sandra Bullock to Sara Michelle Gellar to Jessica Biel. The only project that seems nearish to happening is a cameo Wonder Woman appearance in yet another Superman/Batman movie. And what’s the talk about Gal Godot, the Israeli-born actress selected for the iconic role? That her boobs aren’t big enough. Seriously, for those who were excited at an actual kickass heroine about to grace the silver screen, we must have forgotten that the only important things about women are our bust sizes and abilities to reproduce.

It’s bad enough that she’s playing third fiddle to male counterparts. But does the focus need to be on the size of Wonder Woman’s ta-tas? Godot’s response is that if people are looking for historical accuracy when it comes to the Amazonian Wonder Woman, they’ll find a woman with only one breast since Amazons were rumored to have cut or burnt off their right breasts so they could throw their javelins or use their bows more easily.

Godot has got some big bra straps to fill as the only actress people think of when it comes to Wonder Woman is the indomitable Lynda Carter. Have you seen the woman? She is 62-years-old and remains as hot and as badass as she ever was. When she’s not being a lounge singer (a career I was clearly born for except for my inability to carry a tune), she’s often rowing up and down the Potomac River, speeding past people 1/3 her age and even helping the police fish dead bodies out of the river.

For all the little girls who spun around in their Wonder Woman underoos as fast as they could, wishing they’d turn into the real deal, I hope the old white men who run Hollywood let us have our moment in the sun. Better yet, let’s take it from them and make it a moment when we’re not the backup or distraction for the hero, when we’re the ones large and in charge, kicking ass and taking names.

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Hat Tips:

South ParkComic Book ResourcesScreen RantGal GodotDigital JournalThe Jerusalem PostE OnlineDaily MailMetroHuffington Post, Image Credit: Flickr

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