Adrienne BoettingerFriday,6 December 2013

The Snap:

In the chaos of the past several months, we haven’t checked in on Head Oompa Loompa and Lacrimal Leader, John Boehner. We could take the coward’s way out and say that it’s been easy to forget about the Speaker as he’s been so ineffectual at anything other than obstructionism, but let’s be fair: he’s had a lot of help from both sides of the aisle in stopping anything from getting done. However, he’s risen to the top again, much like the vomit rising in my esophagus when I think of what an absolute waste of old, white (or in the Speaker’s case, orange), male, Protestant skin the 113th Congress has become. The 113th Congress is on track to get even less done and work fewer days than those all-stars in the 112th. Woo hoo! And what’s that coming up again in mid-January? Oh, that’s right: another potential government shutdown! Let the blame games begin!

The Download:

One could almost feel sorry for John Boehner. The cray-crays in his chamber are calling the shots and he seems as capable of checking their lunacy as a hall monitor would be at stopping a Tomahawk strike. Of course, one man is not to blame for the massive failure that is the 113th Congress. But considering the amount of power he could wield if he chose to work through the hard issues, my empathy for the weepy orange one dries up pretty quickly.

Some among you may say, “Now, Adrienne, you pinko, bleeding heart, sanctimonious liberal. Just because Congress passes a lot of laws doesn’t mean that Congress is successful and just because a Congress doesn’t pass many laws doesn’t mean that Congress is craptastic.” Fair enough. However, I call shenanigans when the paltry laws that Congress is able to pass deal with naming post offices and commemorative coins for the National Baseball Hall of Fame, and not with things like a farm bill, immigration policy, highway bill, defense bill, gun control or budget.

At this point, I really could give a ferret fart about which side is more in the wrong: House Republicans or Senate Democrats. Given their poor performance all around, I’d say the majority are more concerned with keeping their own jobs and banking as much dough as they can than rather than governing.

Well, 113th Congress, what do you do now that you’ve won the prize for worst Congress ever? Are you going to Disney World? Or will you eschew the spinning teacup ride to spend the insane amount of days that you are on “recess” campaigning for your own reelection? And what of you, dear, maddening American electorate? What will you do as we enter what will no doubt be a bloody midterm election cycle? Will you mindlessly cast your vote again for the name you recognize or will you actually look at what your representatives did — in your name — with their time in Washington? The choice is yours.


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Hat Tips:

Market WatchWashington PostPBSPoliticoGovTrackWHASHuffington Post, Image Credit: Flickr


  1. […] been far too long since we’ve paid any attention to House Speaker John Boehner and for that we must make amends. We could try to lay the blame at the feet of the Rip Van […]

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